Boats and Bikes

The Muddy Water Book Club (outside the pub in Wivenhoe)

Once a week, the boat ‘Miss Baudet‘ becomes home to the world’s smallest book club – with 2 permanent members; my publisher David Roberts and me.

But now ANYONE can join, simply by going to our YouTube channel, The Muddy Water Book Club

Discover the best maritime story ever…

Soon after moving to Wivenhoe, an old dilapidated boat was offered to me for free. All I had to do was to have it transported from 80 miles away, and find somewhere to keep it.

It needed plenty of work doing, but I thought “why not? I could grow plants on it and it can be our garden.”

I kept a blog ‘A Boat For My Potplants‘, and as soon as I began it, all sorts of positivity followed.

Extracts were published in Essex Life Magazine, and before long I was offered nautical goodies for my renovation project – including the canopy, tools, a solar panel, window seals, and paint.

I spent every possible day over at the boat sheds, injecting new life into the formerly-named Kingfisher. I discovered beneath the paint was the boat’s previous name Solace. I renamed it Los Amigos. Whoever said it’s unlucky to change a boat’s name was clearly wrong!

The boat was towed to its new mooring position outside the pub in Wivenhoe where we were met by well-wishers lining the Quay, many of whom walked the plank with gifts of potted geraniums and pansies.

Nothing was lacking – except a motor, so I wrote to Suzuki in the hope I they could provide me with an ex-demo outboard.

They replied “We’re sure we can do something,” and a few months later, a brand new 9.9hp motor was fitted.

The boat was now fully river-worthy and I could captain my boat, all thanks to a few words written on the Internet, lots of positive energy and the goodwill of the people I met along the way.

I then had an idea, and I invited my DJ friend Mark Wesley to repeat our previous radio experience (see HERE), this time aboard my boat.

A few weeks later we broadcast The Barnacle Bill Show from THE WORLD’S SMALLEST PIRATE RADIO STATION, using a small transmitter and the worldwide internet.

Hundreds of people gathered on the quayside to tune in on their portable radios, and requests also came from afar, such as Paul in Spain asking for a Billy Idol song, and Kate in Minneapolis requesting The Who.

But the magic of A Boat For My Potplants didn’t stop there…

…Every year Wivenhoe gardeners open their horticultural spaces to the public, and funds are raised for local good causes. I was invited to include my boat as one of the ‘gardens’, and someone suggested me having a gorilla on top.

“That sounds perfectly reasonable,” I thought.

I changed the boat’s name AGAIN, to Miss Baudet, and now, since becoming a writer (how did that happen?), I’ve been hosting my weekly ‘MUDDY WATER BOOK CLUB’ consisting just two members – David Roberts (author of, among others, Rock Atlas) and me.

Ex-Guinness Publishing editor David knows a thing or two about books, and he’s he’s been mentoring, editing, collaborating, designing and publishing with me since 2014.

The truth is I’m not a natural seafarer, and I prefer being aboard with my laptop, just bashing out words and playing the on-board record player.

Anything can happen with Miss Baudet, and quite often it does.

Four Blokes on Bikes

… how four dads met in the pub every Wednesday and cycled the world (well, not quite the whole world, but some of it)…

Back in 1999, my mates Paul, Mike, Martin and I used to take time out from our busy schedules of being new fathers, and we’d meet weekly with a bunch of other local dads in a north London pub, where any mention of nappies was banned. Only ‘men’ topics like cars, computers, music, football… and cycling were allowed.

One evening in 1999 we hatched a plan to make a trip from Hammersmith Bridge to the source of the Thames by bike.

Ever since then we’ve done a bike ride over 4 or 5 days, usually via a cheap Ryanair flight. Back then we could take our own bikes for free, but nowadays that’s prohibitively expensive, so we hire bikes on arrival instead.

Now that we’re all in our 60’s and 70’s, we get e-bikes. Some say it’s cheating. I disagree – we still have to pedal, but now we can go further and quicker.

In the year 2028 it will be our 30th anniversary and we’ve already decided to do the source of the Thames route again, but this time London-bound.

Hopefully we’ll continue these trips for many more years beyond 2028. 

Source of the Thames 1999 Our first ride was from Hammersmith Bridge in London, following the River Thames along paths and through fields in Surrey, Buckinghamshire, Berkshire, Oxfordshire, Wiltshire and Gloucestershire. 120 miles. Only Paul, Martin and me that year.

Cannes, France 2000 Only Martin and me this time, arriving at Nice airport with our own bikes, and heading to Antibes along the coast- road and then north to Valbonne where we had accommodation. From there we did a day trip to Cannes and back, and then home to Stansted.

Côte d’Azure, France 2001 A return trip to Nice, this time the four of us bringing own bikes – which was economically viable back then. We stayed in Opio, near Valbonne, then rode to Cannes and returned to Nice along the coast. 66 miles covered.

Lake Garda, Italy, 2002 Via Breschia, staying at Sirmione and cycling clockwise around half the lake’s shore, then getting a boat back to base. I suffered a cracked rib after attempting to cycle down steps. Stupid irriot me! 55 miles covered.

Bilbao and the Basque region, 2003 This year there were five of us. Jay, another mate from Friern Barnet, joined us to cycle to the coastal town of Lekeitio. 66 miles.

Tavira, Portugal, 2004 Joined by Lawrence this time instead of Jay, we flew to Faro on the south coast and headed east to Tavira. Partially inland, partially coast. 70 miles total. The best lunch ever – sardines and boiled potatoes in a roadside café. That was the only menu choice, but it was superb.

Ischia, Italy, 2005 Still taking our own bikes on Ryanair, but becoming more expensive. This year we flew to Naples and cycled through the city to the coastal port where we got the ferry to the small volcanic island. Injury to my back due to attempting cycling down very steep woodland hillside instead of sticking to the road.

Kobarid, Slovenia, 2006 Flying into Trieste with our bikes and getting a minibus to take us up the Soča Valley, where we then cycled along the mountain ridge and back down to Italy. It was cold.

Normandy, France, 2007 This time we got the ferry from Newhaven to Dieppe and cycled along the Normandy coast to stay at the pretty seaside town of St Valery-en-Caux. And we got lost and ended up going through a field.

Tizi ‘nTest, Morocco, 2008 We wanted to go somewhere special for our 10th bike ride so we spent the first night in Marrakesh then headed towards the Atlas mountains. I thought it would be a good idea to hire a van to take us to the top of a mountain and leave us there to ride back down. It was great, but it certainly wasn’t all downhill.

Kinsale, Ireland, 2009. After flying into Cork airport, we headed 20kms south to the coastal town that’s home to around 30 pubs. We stayed at my mum’s house and cycled around the local countryside and to the beach.

Istanbul, Turkey, 2010 This was the last time we took our own bikes. I wrote and asked for permission to ride around the Turkish Grand Prix circuit, and amazingly they said yes. After that we headed to the island of Buyukada where no cars are allowed, where we stayed 3 nights and then went into the city where I got the worst case of food poisoning from a dodgy chicken curry. I thought I was going to die, and was bedridden for a week after returning home.

Tallin, Estonia, 2011. The first trip to one of the Baltic countries, where we went to the old town of Tallin and then to the coast. Being intrepid, we decided to venture back to our accommodation off-track through the woods that then became the thickest forest we’d ever encountered. It was a wonder we got out alive and not eaten by native bears that apparently do live there.

Tenerife, Spain, 2012 What could be better than being taken on a guided tour in a van up to the top of the volcano, and left to cycle all the way back to the costal town where we were staying? Well, it would have been better if the brakes on my hire-bike hadn’t broken.

Brussels, Belgium, 2013 This year we went by Eurostar to Brussels, able to take our own bikes again. We headed to Ypres for a bit of serious culture, experiencing the memorial ceremony at the Menin Gate that’s taken place every single day since the end of the war.  

Valletta, Malta, 2014

Budapest, Hungary, 2015

Kotor, Montenegro, 2016

Leiden, Holland, 2017

Berlin, Germany, 2018

Rovinj, Croatia, 2019

There was no international travel for us in 2020 or 2021 due to them being ‘The Covid Years’. Our planned trip to Lithuania was put on hold, and instead, we went to Walberswick in Suffolk. No bike riding, just walking.

Walberswick, 2020

Walberswick, 2021